A Father's Loss
Supporting our Conviction
We believe that parents do leave the biggest influence on their kids for life... and we know it first hand. However, through History and through the most monotonous every day life, we keep seeing a pattern. Some dads and moms are taking the responsibility to raise a child lightly. Not that we need to check into famous genius folks that were raised by a single parent, but is scary to say the least, how violence is related to a 'parentless' upbringing.
If they Know It, Why Do They Do it?
Society is closing a cycle that we have seen before through History. The Bible talks about the "sign of the times." History buffs refer to the fall of this new Babylon. And Politicians? Making sure they get that bonus at the end of a "successful campaign."
Why do they do it then? Is just a trend set from birth and from our own environment: Your great grandparents fought the biggest recession and knew how to earn those dimes (5 & ten stores). But the big change started around 1918, when World War I came to an end. Going to the point right now, skipping WWII, Korea and Vietnam. Quality of life has gone down the drain and that toilet, that your plumber never fixed it "that well."
You are a kid and you just hear from your parents to get a job after school. But you want the latest Iphone or that Ipad 3. How do we close that gap? By cheating the system and cheating ourselves out of heaven, right into hell. You see a friend doing something fishy, and if your morals are at the lowest level, then you just do it... because every one does it!!
You don't want to dissappoint your friend and join that Spa, Minor league or simply join an "non suitable business."
A Dead beat dad's profile
Just imagine this individual that was practically raised on the streets. His options were limited. Education and college was out of the question. Probably a technical school (Job Corps?) was available for him... to make it in life. But meanwhile, he was already exposed to the worst feelings from a cold Society. Some parents that came back from war had issues of their own and did their best to raise a kid back in the 70's or 80's. However, generations post 'Kent State,' grew wary and willing to explode at any time (enter the serial killers). While policing the world and making Nixon and Bill Clinton notorious political heroes (Bozo), we forgot to work into our own souls. A young deadbeat dad was already trained to work "under the table," and skip that work opening... in order avoid the system and that hungry kid that he gave life. "I'm not going to feed my ex and his new Boyfriend, shoot!!"
- My Son, A Senior Airman.
A piece of inspiration about A father-son relationship, which is based on actual events. Stepdad became a father without noticing it...ups and downs recounted with vivid emotions.
An unusual son
If the kid left behind was raised by a good single mom, then he would definitely join Steve Jobs or Edison on the list of successful entrepreneurs that made it through adversity. But if the mom left him/her go himself/herself cold hearted... that "so help me God" would've sounded worse than the most acceptable "don't ask, don't tell" from everyday life. How ludicrous, selfish and unconquered society can become after the cell has been hit with no mercy? Hello bully kid?
A son who knew that his dad was never there for him, can either become another "like father like son" statistics, but.... yeah, always something right? But if the mom was there for him (son) and showed him that a double standard society cannot stop a mom from making a son a future proud citizen of value. Jean Jacques Rousseau was sponsored by his "protectress" in spite of the fact that his dad left him when he was 10. On his 'Confessions' he wanders all over the Swiss Alps to finally settle at 16 with Madame de Warens in 1728 -- He will be 300 yrs old tomorrow June 28th.
Our Own experience
We became dads to a step-son back in 1992. He was six and was against us from the very beginning. His dad left him when he was 1 year old. Mom gave him one of the best home schooling we could ever imagine. He would cry after those 4 hours of spelling, first grade math homework and a caring mom with a stern voice. "Excuse me Joseph?" We could've called the police on her, but son would've been another street child statistics as well.
We had that hard math trick available for him and we became the best of friends. By coincidence he was already named Joseph. Don't get us wrong, he almost got us poisoned when he was eight and... his mom caught that engine oil in our soda can... not a good taste right?
Our Son Today...
We have shared pieces of him in our hubs, but what really touched us... is, Gee! His ways and the new life he found in the Air Force. As of today he is touring Europe with our 18 year old son, who will join him eventually... after visiting that Eiffel tower, Pisa, the London Olympics and probably Moscow? Two young Americans seeing the world like no other.
What We Discovered...
Joseph Jr. knew about that' $7.00 check' that the system sent him... courtesy of his dad, who didn't want to lose his 'driving privileges' and...Yep! Sent just enough to get by.
Joseph Jr's mom, sent that check back to her ex hubby's house, and wrote: "You might as well shovel this paper up your asset. Not even enough for a happy meal!!"
Joseph Jr. had that in his mind and wanted so bad to reconnect with his own dad... but out of shame or guiltiness... that never happened. Well, we better go straight to the point, and hit the publishing button: Our son has been in Iraq and Afghanistan and other 'classified areas,' and found about a fellow young airman whose young wife was going to have a baby by the time Afghanistan was calling again..? He was strong enough to convince his Superiors to make the switch and let that friend stay with his young pregnant wife and witness (Joseph's friend) his first son's delivery.
In Joseph Jr. Words:
"Hey man! You should stay back with your wife. I'm single, and I know how it feels to be raised without the voice of a biological dad, who could've encouraged us from the very first day... we made it into this world...(classified)" (shake hands and the biggest hug from fellow airman and crying young wife)